Mellow Yellow Submarine

Warning! Do not use MapQuest®  if you are 1. A sleepy seasick swashbuckler who's 'keepin it reel'.
2. Traveling in a submarine, be it yellow or any colour.
3. Taking a long Bungee jump on a short bridge.
4. Wearing lederhosen driving to a dictators house.
5. Wearing a puffy shirt.
6. Reading this, and ironing a puffy shirt.
7. You are lost, but you always will be, and you like it that way.
8. Are saving money on car insurance.
9. Have ever been in the cast of "Cats".
10. Thinking this is Lettermans top ten list.
11. Wearing anything puffy.
12. Flying a kite in a storm because you should be on the $3 Bill.
13. You think 13 is unlucky.
14. And the number 14 top ten reason to not use MapQuest® is, 'Bacon'.